Friday, 21 October 2011


Our LGBT society had another night out a few days ago. We hired out a club, packed it full of gays (and a few heteros), and danced the night away. Another splendid night out filled with a lot of alcohol consumption, bizarre fancy dress outfits, and no doubt the usual sordid homo happenings.

As a brief bit of back-story, our friend, S, has been out for a good couple of years now, but has never really had anything resembling a girlfriend. More like the occasional, and sometimes badly chosen, one night stand. Admittedly I have sometimes encouraged these unfortunate nights of passion, but only out of desperation of helping my friend find happiness in the form of a female. So naturally T and myself are massively gunning for her finding herself a nice ladyfriend to settle down with. On this particular night out we were cutting across the dance floor looking for someone, when lo and behold there was S getting it on with a rather attractive looking female.

Me and T were of course ecstatic for our friend, and excitedly gave her childish grins whenever we caught her eye. So we soon went home, confident in the idea that our friend would see an end to her lesbian dry spell.

No such luck.

After some quick deliberations with S the following day (and supported by a spot of Facebook stalking) it was confirmed that this lusty lady was in fact nothing more than a straight girl masquerading as a queer! Oh no.

Why do straight girls do this?!

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for people having a play on the other side of the fence to see what it’s like. That’s a lot of what university life is about after all. But am I unjustly annoyed by the idea of this? A straight girl going to a specifically LGBT club night and fooling around with some of the innocent gays is surely a bit misleading.

And there’s a word for this. Barsexuals. One that I was only acquainted with last year after spending some time with our housemate B2, who is a massive barsexual. She will quite happily get off with a girl purely in hopes of gaining the attention of surrounding men. She’s a bit of a serial offender actually. Seriously, on the aforementioned night out B2, who is happily in a relationship with a charming man who T and I both quite like, was shamelessly making passes at my ex, J. Shamelessly to the extent that she was genuinely disgruntled that J ignored these straight-girl flirtations.

So, I don’t get it. I don’t get the appeal. Are their efforts not better spent tracking down eligible blokes rather than toying with the time and emotions of us poor dykes?

And does this tactic work for lesbians too? Can I make out with boys to attract the attention of potential dykey lovers? I think not. In fact, I’m pretty sure it’s solely a straight girl thing.

Surely the rest of you have witnessed this phenomenon of the barsexual?

- R 

PS. I had the trudge through a massive amount of photos of chicks making out to find a suitable image for this blog. My life is so hard.

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