Wednesday, 27 January 2016

Tree Hugger

So it’s the new year. A new start. And a whole new way of eating.

I’m becoming vegetarian.

Not from some desire to fulfill some lesbian cliché or because I’m overly into animal rights. In fact, it all started because I wanted to piss off my boss.

I don’t get on with her. We do not like each other. She makes life hard.
Let’s call her, Bitch Face.

And a few months ago, all our repressed anger towards each other ended with us having a huge shouting match in the middle of a laboratory over….eggs.

That’s right.

Over eggs.

Literal eggs.

As in…from a chicken.
Specifics are,'t important, but the short story is that eggs were needed. I asked for free range and Bitch Face said she would only buy caged eggs. It all got out of hand with her winding me up, and me being tired of her shit.

So we fought.


And when I came to work the next day, she demanded I apologise, I refused, things did not go down well and we have been working in a frosty silence since.
But now, because of this unfortunate and very public fight, everyone in the Science department thinks I’m some seriously passionate, obsessed animal activist. But, as a silver lining, it’s really annoying Bitch Face – it’s just a huge reminder that she very publicly declared to the science department that she can’t be arsed to pay 50p extra to help give animals a better life. So when people asked me if I was vegetarian...I said yes. Because it annoyed her.

But our argument did get me thinking. About animal rights, about an animal’s quality of life, and more I’ve thought about it, and the more I’ve spoken to other people, the more I’ve realised that vegetarianism is something I would like to have a proper shot at.

So it’s happened.

I’m a fully-fledged lesbian now.
I’ve got my happy domesticated life. My wife-to-be. My cat. And now, my vegetarianism.



No comments:

Post a Comment